Emotional work of memoir writing
The joy of finding my audio diary!
Mining your past for life lessons
A memoir is mining your personal past for lessons learnt in the arc of a life.
Like life itself, writing a memoir can take you to unexpected places. It can require revisiting difficult times. I’ve often wondered how I’d be able to write about specific things. Yet, when I sit down to write it, I find a way to express my authentic self and explore my humanity.
My journal and diaries show fears, insecurities, crises, raw emotions and vulnerabilities. It isn’t easy seeing my existential anguish and fear laid bare on the page.
Nurture, not nature
Digging into deep-seated insecurities of the past can bring to the surface childhood traumas. The fear of abandonment, poor self-esteem, distrust borne of nurture, not nature. It makes me glad that, over time, I have learnt and grown a little in wisdom.
Self-knowledge, understanding and acceptance is a good thing. My documented life plays a humble role in showing what it is to be human.
Three new episodes
I started the week thinking I had to cut 18,500 words of research to one 800-word episode. But as I worked, I discovered not one but three gems. Each deserved its own episode. Three days later, I had 2,400 more ‘good’ words.
Golden floppy disks!
Thirty years ago, I recorded an audio diary for more than a year. But I lost the tapes and transcripts. They were not on my computer, backup drives or online storage. I concluded I must have deleted them.
Last summer, we improved the insulation in our attic. Twenty years of boxes, folders and papers came down. Among the monstrous pile were scores of floppy disks. I dared to hope. Might they include the missing audio diary transcripts?
Fort Knox!
Many of the floppy disks proved inaccessible. Even my local computer guru couldn’t access them. The data had been lost.
Others were accessible through various workarounds. I unearthed letters I’d written which added important, forgotten details. But the misplaced audio diaries stayed missing.
With the third category of file on the floppy disks, a message told me they were password protected. But it didn’t allow me to try out possible passwords. Some file names suggested they could be the missing transcripts.
Gold dust!
I went back to the local computer maestro with these files. They downloaded software and deciphered the old forgotten passwords. Open sesame!
Exuberant, I had found and could read the long-lost transcripts of my audio diary! It’s gold dust for my book. It adds colour, detail and dialogue, enriching my emerging second memoir.
Happy St Patrick’s Day!
Joe Armstrong’s first acclaimed memoir In My Gut, I Don’t Believe is available on Amazon and Audible in paperback, Kindle and audiobook.
#memoirs #humanist