Living with Purpose: Being Over Doing

Reflections on Maslow, Mortality, and Meaning

Joe Armstrong

Dec 20, 2024

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Hi there,

Our lives are fleeting. What are we to do with our remaining days? How are we to be in the time left to us?

The Eternal Question: Doing or Being?

It’s an old debate: doing versus being. It’s there in scripture: Martha versus Mary, the former all do, do, do; the latter choosing to be, to listen, to become self-aware.

A Youthful Search for Meaning

Perhaps my attraction towards my abandoned priestly path, when I was a youth, was my preference for a life of reflection, questioning, and self-awareness. A search for wisdom and meaning, rather than doing stuff.

A young man with his face to camera sitting alone under a tree reading a book deep in thought

I’m still the same. It’s why I am a writer.

Success and Its Limitations

I think of the year that is ending. Chasing ‘success’ by entering Toastmasters contests, winning two club contests but being beaten at the next level up. And a sense of relief at being beaten, that I could get back to being, rather than doing!

Yes, I’m proud of my two club trophies won this year; but ultimately, in the span of a life, probably only meaningful to me alone.

Achievements are ultimately fleeting. Two Toastmasters trophies which graced our home this year, my two memoirs nestled between them. Photo © Joe Armstrong

The Puzzle of Why We Do Anything

As a youth, I couldn’t understand why grown men would play golf: it seemed to me to be an awful waste of time. How is humanity served by someone getting a ball into a tiny hole a considerable distance away in fewer shots than somebody else? I didn’t get it.

man playing golf during daytime — Photo by Courtney Cook on Unsplash

Maslow’s Hierarchy and My Journey

Why do we do anything we do? Maslow’s famous hierarchy of needs is useful in this regard. Happily, my needs for food, water, shelter, clothing and sleep are being met.

My safety and security needs are being met, although being diagnosed with coronary artery disease this year was a shot across the bows, a new and unexpected threat to my life and wellbeing. Happily, I’m under excellent medical supervision, on a strict diet and taking medication to reduce the risk of a ‘heart event’.

I am very lucky in my marriage, family and friends, so my need for love and belonging is being met.

The Burden of Self-Doubt

Next on Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is self-esteem, embracing confidence, achievements, the respect of others and the realization of one’s uniqueness or singularity.

Tick, I’m tempted to write. But, as a writer, the burden of self-doubt sits ever on my shoulder. I need that self-doubt to be true and achieve anything.

Reaching Self-Actualization

Self-actualization lies at the summit of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. I feel I’m there. I’ve dispensed with the religious delusions of my youth. I dared to leave and listen to myself and trust my doubt. I have trusted my ‘inner workings’ and carved my own path in life.

Louver Museum, France, its famous pyramid in the foreground with a spectrum of colour in the sky above it. — Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is often portrayed as a pyramid, with self-actualization at the summit. Photo by Leo Visions on Unsplash

Living with Contradictions and Creativity

I accept my own complexity and contradictions. I accept myself as I am. I am creative and I express my creativity in writing, songs and speeches. I can be spontaneous. I have followed my singular path in life. I’ve been brave, leaving behind security, money and safety. I have found my meaning in my one and only life.

The Questions That Never End

And yet, each day, the questions rise anew: What are we to do with our remaining days? How are we to be in the time left to us?

thin pathway between green trees — The path less travelled. What are we to do with our remaining days? How are we to be in the time left to us? Photo by Zack Silver on Unsplash

Listen to our latest song It’s a Wonderful Life (A Christmas Tale)

You can listen to our new song on your preferred platform by clicking the links below or you can watch the video with the lyrics, as you prefer.

Video with Lyrics

Call to Action

Listen, like and share! Ask your local radio station to play it! If you mention the song on social media, please use the following hashtags:

#ItsAWonderfulLifeAChristmasTale
#ItsAWonderfulLife

Music and Lyrics “It’s a Wonderful Life (A Christmas Tale)” © Joe Armstrong, Andrea Patron, Bryan Matthews, Zac Ware, Corinne Schmidiger, Paul Statham

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